Doug was very happy to see his family! His Aunt, Mom, and Sister came to visit him and he perked up quite a bit and even got quite chatty. Doug loves his family very much.
Unfortunately, Doug started running a slight fever, which hadn’t been an issue up until now, so the doctor ordered a chest Xray to look for pneumonia since this bad flu is going around. They have found no proof of infection thus far but are treating him with antibiotics as a precaution. His pain comes in waves and it must be quite severe because he will lie there with a grimace on his face. I keep reminding him that one of the reasons he is here is so he doesn’t have to suffer and he is not bothering the nurse by asking her for relief; they have all been very kind here.
We cried together today when I told Doug I saw a male Cardinal bird in the backyard when I went back home to get some things to bring to the hospital. We have come to think of this beautiful bird as a symbol of Doug’s departed father, Wally. I told Doug that I waved to the Cardinal and said “Hi Wally”; Wally is watching over his son—I am certain of that fact. I didn’t intend to make him cry but he is exhausted from dealing with the pain. We have a lot of loss and sorrow over the last year…sometimes it just gets to you; but, you have to keep grinding along.
“If peace is homeless, so are you and so am I. And He Who is our home is homeless with us. Is this your wish? Would you forever be a wanderer in search of peace? Would you invest your hope of peace and happiness in what must fail?”
“The body can bring you neither peace nor turmoil; neither joy nor pain. It is a means, not an end. It has no purpose of itself, but only what is given to it. The body will seem to be whatever is the means for reaching the goal that you assign to it. Peace and guilt are both conditions of mind, to be attained.”
“It is impossible to seek for pleasure through the body and not find pain. It is essential that this relationship be understood, for it is one the ego sees as proof of sin. It is not really punitive at all. It is but the inevitable result of equating yourself with the body, which is the invitation to pain. (emphasis added) For it invites fear to enter and become your purpose.”–A Course in Miracles Chapter 19 The Attainment of Peace Section VIII, The Attraction of pain.
One must remember that this persisting illusion (our “existence”) will fade away. Through faith, eternity and miracles are one’s birthright. Pain is in your past, and may well be in your future, but linear time is a trick. You can be King of your own Castle of consciousness and through the reality of mindfulness free yourself from every illusion for it is only in the very blink of your eye that you are free from pain, guilt and suffering. This instant is yours.–TB